Man Enough
by golwenadaneth
Summary: Willow is badly hurt, will Spike admit exactly how he feels, or just skulk off as usual.


**Man enough to admit it **

She was coming, he could just pick up the vanilla bath oil she used and the little something that was just Willow. In thirty seconds shed walk through that door and he would have to sit not ten feet from her without touching her all night. It was getting ridiculous, he couldn't get her out of his head, little things had started to remind him of her or the scent of vanilla would send him off into space. Hed wanted to turn her at first, and then when hed been chipped hed been fascinated by her and now he just wanted to possess her, own her, body and soul. She was such a spitfire she didn't usually show it but occasionally shed let go and unleash on one of her friends or wail on a demon they were fighting and when she did she was even more amazing, her eyes wild and hair mussed and her breasts heaving from the efforts of her outburst. Satan he had it bad, and he knew it. He hadn't meant to fall for the little witch, she was only a human but she was remarkable. She was the only one of the Scoobies who bothered to check he was all right, or cared if he was happy and she lit up a room when she entered.

He really had to reign it in, shed be there in a few seconds and he couldn't risk her figuring out how he felt about her, hed first of all end up as a candidate for a dust buster add and second probably get laughed out the watchers house. He got ahold of himself just as she poked her head round the door.

"Hey Spike, Giles in?"  
"Yeah Red, hes just gone to fetch somethin from upstairs, book I think"  
"Cool, Ill just set up my laptop and get started"

She closed the front door behind her and walked over to the table, she plugged the phone line in and started to tap away on the keys. She was having a hard job not staring at the bleach blonde sat on the couch, he was just slouched there, feet up on the puff, cigarette hanging out his mouth, remote in his hand.

(Goddess he looks fine, stop that, bad thoughts, bad Spike thoughts)

Shed been thinking about him a lot lately, his piercing blue eyes and spiky blonde hair

(and oh that sexy body, all muscle and sinew)

but not just his body and looks, his sense of humour too, he always managed to make her laugh, he seemed to make it his lifes work to get a grin out of her, even if the others couldn't hear what hed said. She found herself listening intently whenever he spoke and caught herself almost drooling a few times. She had it bad, shed been wondering about him on and off since he tried to rip her throat out in her dorm room, but she knew hed never be interested in her, not plain ol Wills, net girl, wolfs reject, but a wiccan could dream couldn't she. She gave a sigh and got on with her research, trying to concentrate on anything but the vampire sat opposite her.

"Spike, Watch out!"  
"Oomph!"  
"Oh, Spike you okay?"  
"Yeah just gimme a minute luv"

Theyd all split to go on patrol earlier on in the evening, Xander, Anya and Giles had taken Restfield cemetery, Buffy had taken the park and the Bronze and Spike and Willow had gone to Lester state cemetery, theyd only spotted a few bumbling fledges and theyd thought it was gonna be a quiet night, that was until the slothe Demon had attacked them. Like its name it wasn't very fast but it was big and lumbering and it was going to take pure brute strength to defeat it. Willow kept hoping Buffy would show up to check on them, it wasn't that she didn't trust Spikes fighting ability, or that she thought the demon was stronger than him, it was the fact that at the moment the Blonde Vampire she was crushing on was also being crushed by the Slothe, he was huge and just kept coming it didn't matter how many times he tried to beat the thing down Spike was losing because he just kept getting back up. He was bleeding from a nasty slash above his eye, so he could only see out of his left side, all he could see out of the right was blurry images covered in crimson liquid. He was favouring his right leg where the thing had kicked out at him, Willow remembered hearing the sound of snapping as one of his bones splintered, and he had a wound in his stomach, it was an ugly gaping wound with blood flowing freely and it made a sucking noise every time Spike bent over. Willow was petrified by now, Spike was losing and she had no way to defend him or herself. Thankfully the demon hadn't really noticed her, just the vampire trying to kill him.

Suddenly the Slothe turned and eyed Willow, Spike noticed and tried to get his attention back on the fight but it just swatted him away like a bug, he came lumbering towards her picking up speed as it went Willow screamed and ran, she ran as fast as she could but she was only human and after about ten minutes her legs were aching and she was having trouble breathing, not knowing what else to do she looked around frantically for somewhere to hide, she spotted a large crypt with the door slightly ajar, she sprinted over to it and slipped inside. While she was trying to catch her breath she snuck a look out of the crack in the door and the demon was not fifty yards away, he seemed to be sniffing the air for something, then his eyes glazed and he swung round to look directly at the crypt, it stumbled over to the door and ripped it off its hinges. He grabbed her round the waist and lifted her out and into the cool night air, Willow took one look at the thing and screamed,

"SSSSPPPPIIIKKKKEEEEE!"

Spike was laying on the cemetery floor wounded and bleeding, he had seen the thing look at Willow like she was dinner and tried to distract him but itd just pushed him away like an annoying pest, he knew he had to get up and go and save Will but he was in so much pain, everything hurt, he was bleeding from three or more nasty wounds and he could hardly stand on his right leg, he knew hed broken one or two bones, and he knew hed heal, but not even a master vampire can take as many wounds and not have to stop and call defeat, the only thing stopping him from slipping into blackness was the thought of what would happen to his Red. He was trying to stand when he heard Willow scream his name, hed never heard anything so full of despair and dread, paying no attention to his injuries he took off at top speed in the direction of the sound, he reached the crypt she had been hiding in, in under a minute, and when he got there what he saw made his blood run even colder, the Slothe demon had Willow in a strong hold around her waist and was trying to take a bite out of her, Willow was struggling and pounding her fists into it with all she had but it was having no affect on it what so ever, he could see she was getting tired and giving up.

He heard a ear shattering howl, and wondered for only a second where it had come from, then he realised it had come from him, he Vamped out and snarled at the demon,

"No you don't mate, let her go"

It didn't seem to hear him or either it did and it ignored him, which just served to anger him more,

"One more chance mate, let her go or loose your head"

Willow was now hanging limp in the demons arms and she looked like she was going to pass out, it had managed to take a chunk out of her shoulder and she was bleeding heavily, her orange top was stained with her own blood and the stain was steadily getting bigger. Spikes heart almost beat in his unmoving chest, she looked dead,

(No, She cant be, I cant loose her)

And that was the last coherent thought he had, he launched himself at the demon and kicked him in the back, he was sure he heard bones snapping but the thing kept on trying to eat Willow, he just ripped into him, clawing and slashing, biting and pounding his fists into him, it let go of Willow and she fell to the grass with a sickening thud, Spike just carried on laying into the thing until it was on the floor unmoving. He was brought back to reality by a small whimper coming from the red head laying in an awkward position on the floor, his head shot up and he scrambled on his hands and knees over to her inert form, he started to stroke her hair and coo to her trying to get her to open her eyes,

"Come on luv, wake up, Luv, Red, please open your eyes"  
"Sp..Spike?"  
"Yeah Luv its me,come on open your eyes, please you need to stay awake, youve lost a lot of blood"  
"Im so tired Spike, so tired"  
"NO, Open your god damn eyes girl, you can not go to sleep"  
"Please Spike, so tired and everything hurts, please"  
"Willow, I swear to Satan if you go to sleep I will never speak to you again, just stay awake, Im gonna get you to a hospital"

He picked here up and nearly collapsed, his leg was bowing in the opposite direction and he was having troubled keeping himself upright. He tightened his grip on her and started out in a dead sprint towards the nearest hospital, it took him just five minutes to crash through the doors of the emergency room and yell for someone to help them,

"Someone please, shes lost a lot of blood, please you need to help her"  
"Whats her name"  
"Willow Rosenberg"  
"Willow, Willow can you hear me"  
"Please just help her, I cant loose her... please"

A pack of nurses lowered her onto a gurney and wheeled her away through a set of double doors, Spike went to follow, but was stopped by a hand on his arm, he turned almost amber eyes on the owner of said hand and snarled at him,

"You cant go with her, you need to be looked at aswell, some of these cuts look bad,"  
"No, I want to go with her, Im fine"  
"Please sir"  
"William, and Im FINE! shes the one who needs help, look just help her please"  
Okay, okay William just sit here and wait, let our people work on her, do you need to call, anyone, family, friends?"  
"Oh bloody hell, there going to kill me"

The doctor took his details and Willows and then went off in the same direction as theyd taken her, Spike felt like crying, hed never felt so strongly for anyone, not even Dru, and the girl he was so madly in love with was currently fading in the other room. He looked around the lobby and saw what he was searching for, the phone, he took a deep un-needed breath and picked up the receiver and popped some coins into it.

The phone rang at the watchers for eight rings, Spike was about to give up and try somewhere else when a very worried sounding Giles answered the phone,

"Hello"  
"Watcher..look"  
"Spike is that you, where the hell are you, weve been going out of our minds, you were sposed to be back ages ago"  
"look, watcher..Giles, just listen okay, Im in the emergency room, we ran into the Slothe Demon"  
He heard the sudden intake of breath and the slayer and the moron in the back ground trying to get information.  
"Is she..is she badly hurt Spike"  
"I don't know, She...she lost a lot of blood, the bloody thing took a bite out of her, Giles she was so pale, I tired to stop it but it was so bloody strong, she ran and it caught her"  
"Spike..Spike calm down, which emergency room are you in?"  
"The one off of forth and vine, tell the slayer to hurry"  
"Okay well be there soon, sit tight"

He hung up and went to sit down, he needed a smoke but didn't want to leave just incase something happened with Willow, so he sat and rocked back and forth until the watcher and the rest of the Scoobies turned up. When they got there the sight that greeted them was pitiful, Xander and Buffy had wanted to kill Spike for letting this happen but when they saw him, rocking back and forth, bloody tears streaming down his cheeks, both their hearts melted, they knew he had a crush on their redheaded friend but they never knew he felt so strongly for her. Buffy tapped him on the shoulder and softly called his name, what he did next almost made her faint, he leapt out of his chair and clung to her sobbing, he was babbling incoherently and yelling at the same time.

"Spike, Spike calm down, tell us what happened"  
"I tried Slayer, I tried to stop it, but it was so strong and big and it just kept coming, it broke my leg and put a hole in my stomach and I couldn't see out of my left eye..."  
He took a breath, not because he needed to but because even after almost two centuries as a demon he still fell back on human reaction when he was in distress, The slayer took the opportunity to look him over, he was in awful shape aswell, he had a gaping wound in his belly, a slash over his left eyes and he couldn't stand on his right leg, she thought she could see bone poking through the fabric of his jeans. He really had defended her best friend with everything he had, she was surprised he was even conscious, let alone keeping his human face in place.  
"I believe you Spike, I do, just tell us what happened"  
"The Slothe just stopped paying me any attention and looked at willow, I knew I had to get his attention back on me but when I tried to he just swatted me away, like some bloody insignificant bug, I tried to get back up and stop him but everything hurt so bad, Slayer you have to believe me I tried"  
"I do, go on Spike"  
"I heard Willow scream my name and I just lost it, she had run and hidden in a crypt, but it must have been able to smell her cos when I got to them the door was off its hinges and he had hold of her, hed taken a bite out of her shoulder and she was bleeding so badly, she was trying to beat it off but it was so strong, she had no hope, then she started to pass out from blood loss, I lost it completely then, I beat it to a bloody pulp"  
At least they knew it was dead and it wouldn't be back.  
"She kept telling me she was tired, I tried to keep her awake, but she said she just wanted to sleep, Satan if she dies, I don't think I can.."

His voice broke then, he collapsed on the floor in a bloody, sobbing heap and started rocking back and forth again, Buffy , Xander and Giles had never seen him like this, not even when Dru had left him for the chaos demon, he was a shadow, and it was unnerving, they were so used to the bravado and wit that was William the Bloody, not this pathetic sniveling thing sat before them, and suddenly Buffy knew, she knew how he felt, he loved Willow with all his unbeating heart and would die for her, she knew because that's how shed felt about Angel, for three years shed eaten, slept and thought Angel and now Spike was going through the same thing, just the thought of Angel fading was horrific, she was suddenly back in the mansion, sword in hand and Angel knelt on the floor tears in his eyes, eyes that were pleading with her to help him, and then she was on the floor next to him, cradling him in her arms, rocking with him, telling him it would be okay, and not to worry.

Giles and Xander looked on in awe and they knew, they would never distrust him again, never suggest staking him, not now, not after what hed just admitted, he was in love with Willow and Buffy believed him, that was good enough for them. They all sat there in somber silence waiting for the doctor to come and tell them how their friend was, all thinking the worst but hoping for the best.

She was floating, across an agitated sky with dark storm clouds gathering all around her, a clap of thunder nearly made her heart stop and then fork lightening started to strike the ground as if it was angry with it for something she didn't quite understand, she was light headed and felt like a bubble being thrown around the cosmos on the whim of the wind. She couldve sworn she heard her name being called across the winds, drifting towards her on feathery wings and tinkling around her like falling rain drops on shattered glass. She knew she should be somewhere, that she had someone that she had to see but she couldn't for the life of her remember where and who. So instead of going towards her name she floated away swirling and twisting with the eddying leaves.

They had been let in to see her, she looked so pale and fragile, like she might break into a thousand pieces at any minute. Buffy lay on the bed beside her stroking her fiery locks and talking to her in hushed and saddened tones. The doctor had called the others outside to tell them how she was doing, but the slayer had refused to leave her friends side, just as if she looked away for more than a few seconds the redhead would disappear from sight.

"Come on Wills, you cant stay asleep for ever, I know youd do anything to get out of psyche but this is ridiculous"

There was no response, she was so hoping that her friend would sit up and laugh at her, but she just lay there looking deathly pale and breathing steadily as if in a pleasant slumber.

"Please..Will, please don't leave me, I..I don't think I could take it on my own, you know your my big gun right, my rock, the one I lean on far too much and never tell how much I appreciate. God, if you could see me now, Im a mess Will and youve only been gone a week, did you know how much I love you, I never tell you enough, but I do, youve been there for me every time, even when I wasn't there, you still had my back, calling my corner, sticking your neck out for me. Surprisingly, and please don't laugh at me, but Spike has kind of been a rock too, I know I wail on him and I take every possible opportunity to take sly and not so sly digs at him, but hes been great, he loves you too you know, I mean really loves you, I don't think I've ever seen him so broken...he needs you to come back and fix him. I thought he just had a crush on you, but no, he loves you with a passion, to someone who doesn't live in the sun your like a ray of light, and he wishes he could have done more to stop this happening to you, hes really beating himself up over it, he wont feed, refuses to go and get any rest, the only reason hes not here now is cos he wanted to know what the doctor had to say, come on will sit up and laugh at me or something, I just..I need you, please.."

Outside the room, Spike wiped a few stray bloody tears off of his cheeks and took an un-needed but much wanted breath, If only shed wake up, say something, he could rest, sleep easy, but all the time she was out he would be there, one of the first things she was going to see when she woke up was him looking out for her. He didn't think he could carry on like this, indefinitely, not knowing if she was going to wake, or if she was lost forever.

Giles sat watching Buffy watch Willow, his heart went out to her, he kept praying to the heavens that shed wake up soon, the longer it went on the less chance there was of her being able to ever wake up. It seemed that Spike truly did love the little redhead, he hadn't left her side for more than an hour in a week, he refused to feed, get rest, anything but watch over the gifted girl laying in the hospital bed. Xander was falling apart, Anya kept trying to get him to sleep, eat something, just take a break, but without Willow there he seemed to not care if he wasted away!

To Be Continued...


End file.
